Pizza Rolls vs. Bagel Bites

By Shamus Diggin:

Throughout culinary history there have been many debates by fancy food maniacs over the overall greatness between bagel bites and pizza rolls. It has been proven that both products carry a relative pizza flavor and odor, but could one actually be better than the other! It is true that when pizza is served on a bagel you could have it any time, but that doesn’t mean you should. On the very few ocassions were in fact I consumed bagel bites I was in a deep druken haze were I didn’t have the capabilities of making much of anything that didn’t come out of a can or my freezer.

I know bagel bites are distributed within a box but that is beside the point, which is that bagel bites taste like dried up pieces of shit with ketchup as the main ingredient. Now on the other side of the pizza fence, pizza rolls encompass a quick direct blast of flavor that no chef named Guido could ever compete with. They provide the traditional Italian grandmother sauce ingredients with the integrity of american consumerism. I am sure that there is no food out there that can produce the flavor of a pizza roll with the exception of actual pizza. Why put pizza on a bagel when you can just roll one

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